So, I’m about to go off on one of my random, un-planned tangents.. Hold on to your hats, knickers, briefs or whatever else you feel like holding on to!
First I will apologize to my male gendered followers! This is a complete open discussion and I hope to get your weigh in on this as well. (This IS a term and situation that effects us all. I just don’t want you all afraid to talk as it happens to be a woman asking the question! I’m not easily offended, so don’t be afraid to speak up with your gender’s perspective on this as well!!), and I hope everyone can play nice because I just want a polite and enlightening conversation for all of us! I’m not trying to be offensive to anyone.
I was sitting with my man watching the amazing movie “Ghostbusters 2” which annoys him, because it’s an AMAZING movie and I pretty much know it by heart and love to talk along with all of the word and sing along to all of the songs (… I know. GHOSTBUSTERS II?? But, I can’t help myself… I love the cheesy humour! “Do.. Ray… EGON!”) Anyways.. I Digress within my digression……
I happened to make an off-hand comment to him (after seeing Sigourney Weaver in a towel)
“I could totally pull off Sigourney if I were in shape!” (of course his automatic response was “you are in shape”… Smart man after 10 years!! 😉😉)
It started me thinking though. I think it’s so funny that in this PC age when, everyone is fighting so hard to instill change in the way we phrase things, and identify people, and yet an antiquated phrase like “out if shape” is still a common place thing?.. Or, is it just me? In a world where women like Amy Schumer
And Melissa Mccarthy
Are sexy and wonderful role models, how are we (or I??) still hung up on this? Guys, I think you may have it even worse! We all seem to fight stereotyping shape with women, but thinking of the fabulous women above took me all of 2 seconds… but, I couldn’t think of a male role model who would fit the bill of the “every man” type! …isn’t it sad that we focus so much on helping females, that no one think about the body issues that men have to deal with??
I would still like to ask EVERYONE, in a world that seems to be so keen on fighting against every stereotye…
What is “the shape” that we are out of??
And why is it that everything is taboo to think and say, and yet these body image issues are still going strong? I honestly want to know… So, please, help me out in the comments below if you have any thoughts on the issue.
It’s hard isn’t it. I think it comes down to the belief that fat = unhealthy. Although that belief is totally unfounded as so many larger people are actually in really great shape. As someone who is technically “overweight” according to my BMI, I know that I could be perfectly happy with my current weight. I am healthy and exercise regularly. But the choice is more personal. I chose to aim to lose weight. Because I know when I am slimmer I feel better in myself. But the perception from others plays a massive role in how some women feel about themselves. I’m not sure what the answer is…
LikeLiked by 3 people
Ya. I was talking to a male friend of mine who is “overweight” according to his BMI. But, he is over 6′ tall and 220 lbs… How overweight could he be?? I agree that as long as you’re healthy and happy you should be ok with your weight… But, I’ll admit that when I looking at Sigourney in a towel I wasn’t thinking “my, she looks HEALTHY” Lol! 😉
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yeah, that’s true. I suppose we have been conditioned as a society to think that slim = beautiful. Wasn’t always that way though.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Definitely not. My favourite thing in the world is 30s pin up girls. Now THAT is sexy!! 💖💖
LikeLiked by 2 people
I think women will always be judged on looks, men not so much, biology plays a big part in it and it’s hard to fight that!
LikeLiked by 4 people
I think both genders fight with this, but I feel like it’s less socially acceptable with men to worry about their shape or looks too much (come on men, SPEAK UP! I want to know!!) but, most of my friends are male and they all complain about not being fit enough or thin enough as well. Like I said, at least we have some realistic women out in the world… I couldn’t think of any inspiring male actors that WEREN’T Hollywood attracting and jacked! 😞
LikeLike
No me neither, I’ll just have to stick with Chris Hemsworth, sigh. 😆
LikeLiked by 3 people
Oh, the woes we must face! 😂😉 Now the REAL question is… Short or long haired??
LikeLiked by 1 person
either will do 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
My man crush, not afraid to admit that.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Any preference for you? Long hair, or short?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Don’t mind. Ladies are my thing, but Hemsworth is a fine specimen.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Definitely! 💖
LikeLiked by 1 person
Do you have any woman crushes?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Omg yes!! I’m sorry that I have to go typical.. But, Angelina will always be my lady. I also had a huge crush of Meg Ryan (adorable) and Julia Roberts (I like my red heads…). I was also completely in love with Judy Garland. 💖💖 I know all of my lady crushed are older or dead. Lol! But, I feel like women in the media world now a days are slightly forgettable… As in, I can’t think of any of them that stick out in my mind! 😋
LikeLiked by 1 person
You have fine taste. Julia is a real sweetheart.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, and I DEFINITELY wouldn’t kick Kate Beckinsale out of bed. 😉💖
LikeLiked by 1 person
Me neither, she’s ravishing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
.. Or Selma Hayek… “From Dusk Til Dawn”?? Yes please. Geez. Maybe I should have made a list before answering this question. Ha ha ha!!! 😂😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
A worthy man crush indeed.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I thought so too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
An extremely perceptive post. It is sad that in this day and age, looks are still so prominent in what people see. It should be about someone’s personality and soul.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I agree. Unfortunately, at the same time, my brain does not. I thought it was funny because I don’t have any serious body issues (I mean, I don’t know anyone who loves themselves ALL THE TIME) But, I still find myself picking on things or saying things like I did then. That I’m not “in shape”. If I’m happy with myself then what shape do I think I should be? It’s tough to get passed that sometimes…
LikeLiked by 1 person
I totally understand you. I believe we all have our hang ups.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks for following my blog, hope you’re enjoying it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am!! 💖
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, it’s good to know.
LikeLiked by 1 person
First of all the clothes made mostly for peeps with slim or fit figures. The media and magazines spreading mostly (at least 90%, I’m checking regularly) the image of small eating nothing but happy girl.
Then also every talk about health – eat less = get small = become beautiful
LikeLiked by 2 people
Exactly!! That’s how I feel the world pushes things. I think that it’s strange that there are so many things we’ve focussed on changing in the world and yet, this just seems to stay the same!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well said ✌️👍😃 agreed.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great question. Good response by ‘the man,’ since it gave you something clever to post about today. I say “out of shape” all the time because in my head, it means something. It’s a silly phrase as you pointed out. For me, it just means I’m not in ‘prime’ condition for whatever I’m trying to achieve. It could be losing 5 more pounds, adding another 1/2 inch muscle somewhere or eating more healthy to stop so much sugar or fat intake. What I really mean is that I need to “do something” to look and feel the way I want.
I’m trying to re-orient my mind to visualizing what it is I want to be/look like, which will not be PERFECT, but will be toned in the right areas, eating healthy, and generally happy with myself when I look in the mirror. That said, I also know my ‘limits’ as far as what I can achieve with my body type and genetics. So ‘in shape’ is really for me — and not a comparison to what others look like anymore. At 5-7, I’m on the shorter side for guys and I’m also on the solid side when it comes to my bone structure, so I’ll always struggle to get the tall, lean length that I might admire in another guy from time to time. But I’m still healthy. And I still like the way I look. It’s just not the supposed PERFECT male model.
I’m not entirely sure where I’m going with this other than to say I agree… it should also be about being healthy from what you eat/drink and how much exercise/physical activity you to keep your body in strong working order. Not about which angle your bone or muscle pushes out furthest or gets skinnied (is that a word?) down to the minimum.
And those pin-up girls were pretty sexy, I must agree.
LikeLiked by 5 people
Thank you for the male point of view on this!! I completely understand! I hope we can all just think about what would make us happy… But, sometimes that isn’t realistic. Thank you for bringing up height, because I DEFINITELY understand that! Being below average in height myself, I feel your pain… By the way, we’re not short, we’re vertically challenged! 😉
I was trying hard to think of a good realistic make role model in Hollywood and, sadly could only think of those giving the opposite impression to males everywhere! Like, Chris Pratt. At first he was a little overweight, so, what character does he play? An almost Chris Farley type kind of lovable dumb character in “Parks & Recs” it took him tonight up and losing weight to get such AAA roles as in “Guardians of the Galaxy” and “Jurassic World” so… What is Hollywood trying to tell us there?? It doesn’t seem right..
LikeLiked by 2 people
Good point on Chris Pratt. I was all-in, then sad when he and his wife announced their divorce. I love Anna Faris (have you ever seen her TV show, Mom?). Vertically challenged, I will remember to use that instead. 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Funny how the divorce came about right when he lost the weight and started to get that e”big roles”… Makes you wonder. And I really have to watch “Mom” I thought it looked so stupid, then I started watching a show that came on after it and would continually catch the end of episodes and it actually looked pretty funny!! … Plus I love William Fitchner. Lol!
LikeLiked by 1 person
EXACTLY! It really bugged me. The first two seasons of MOM with the kids wasn’t as good. Once they left the show, it became much better when it focused on all the recovering alcoholics. They had a tighter bond whereas the kids came across too cheesy.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Funny that when something doesn’t work in a show (like kids being in it) they can just kind of phase them out!! 😂😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Also, “skinnied” is TOTALLY a word. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
It’s interesting how slim seems to be the standard for good body image, but people always get judged for trying to become skinny.
I am naturally on the skinny side and happen to have a tiny appetite, and I always get asked if I’m “controlling my weight.” This tends to offend me, because of how judged I’m made to feel. Ahh, body image is a frustrating thing!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I understand your frustration! Actually, my frustration is similar for 2 reasons.
1. I used to be like you.
2. Now that I’ve gotten older my metabolism has started to slow down (I never thought it would happen!) so, now in my mind I’m still so used to being a certain weight and it bothers me that I’m not anymore. It’s tough when you’re used to being a certain weight for so many years and all of a sudden you can’t seem to maintain that anymore…. Getting old sucks… 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
No way you’re that old! My guess before would have been that you’re in your late 20s? Hmm, but now you’re telling me you’re old and I’m not sure. Being too old is another standard we should be getting rid of, haha!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha! I’m in my mid 30s. I didn’t think it would start so soon, but I swear I hit 30 and my body went in to slow motion! You definitely start to notice a difference! (not that this stops me from being an idiot dancing and hula hooping and trying to do cartwheels and such… I just pay for it a little more later.) 😉🍻
LikeLike
I’m sad to say I have to agree with Fraggle. Fat shaming and a society obsessed with physical appearance will always be part of our culture.😒
LikeLiked by 1 person
I agree as well. It still makes me sad… 😞
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think the “shape” we should be in is “healthy” and that includes a range of body types. And health is actually measurable. I’d say it’s also beautiful. Boring answer, Nicole, but you asked for seriousness. We haven’t found the right word for it, perhaps.
LikeLike
I’m so glad you referenced Melissa Mccarthy! I absolutely love her, she is perfect inside and out.
Also, I love that you start a rant with ‘so’ lol… Every time I start a sentence with ‘so’ at home I can physically watch my husband hold his breath HAHAH
Also, also…. HEATHLY is the absolute perfect shape 🙂 great post!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!! When I started this rant with ‘so’ that’s EXACTLY what my man did! 😂😂 and Melissa McCarthy is amazing. 😄
LikeLiked by 1 person
LMAO! And, yes she is 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I unfortunately don’t have an answer, but the scary thing is that I hear my grade one girls talking about this😢
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow!! That’s SO YOUNG!! I knew that It was starting younger now.. But, GRADE 1?? What do they have to worry about at THAT age?? That makes me SO. SAD. 😢😵
LikeLiked by 1 person
Me too!
LikeLiked by 1 person
The “ideal” for a womans body has changed so much throughout the years. Why is it so hard for us to love ourselves? To see beauty in all our bodies? I’m not sure. I’m still on that journey myself. I think health is the ultimate goal here. Then we assume that others are unhealthy because of their body type. It is so weird and twisted. I’ve had guys tell me that they like my personality, but weren’t attracted to my physically. Ookay then, bye. But when did it become so important that you lose a chance at love? I’m not sure and I’m rambling again. This was a great post to read and I think the world needs a wakeup call on judging others bodies.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ramble away my friend!! I completely agree! It’s crazy that in a world where we can identify as anything we want and we try to cater to everyone to the point if being afraid to open our mouths, and yet, we still all look in the mirror and see wrong if we are over a certain weight or have a certain body type. We need people to be fighting for something that effects EVERYONE!
In this technological age I feel like it’s even worse. I had someone else comment that their 1st grade girls are already worrying about THIS.. 1ST GRADE!! But, with the access they have to the internet and television, it’s hard not to with it being shoved in their faces all over the place.
LikeLiked by 1 person
As a guy who loves to play ball and stay active, I can easily attribute “out of shape” to any moment in my life where I didn’t have time to stay active and be healthy. I don’t have a particular role model that I attribute the “perfect shape”, but I do know when I am “in shape” though hahah It’s quite the burden cause the moment any of my guy friends turn to the sloppy side and don’t take care of themselves, remarks will be thrown around. Hopefully people will seek happiness within their own bodies rather than aim for a certain Hollywood body. It is the best way to enjoy life! 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
WONDERFUL VIEW!! 💖💖 Well, except for making fun of your friends when they start to get a little soft… That’s pretty much perpetuating the issue. (can’t say I haven’t done that myself, though!) Ha ha! 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I agree it is ridiculous it is still an issue. It annoys me personally as well because I am 26, almost have a double master degree and am embarking on, hopefully, a very interesting and succesful career and I STIL worry about being fat and it brings me down. Part of out of shape is feeling fit for me, but part is definetly the weight and the fact that I cannot let go of the idea of needing to be thin, even though it’s absolutely impossible.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s also hard when you used to weigh a certain amount. It’s like everything you gain after that is more than you’re used to and it starts to get to you. I’ve just stopped weighing myself… It makes me feel better. 😅
LikeLiked by 1 person
I can understand that. Not focusing on it then is the best solution.
LikeLiked by 1 person