5 out of 5 stars
A story of the mis-adventures of Rex Nihilo and his robot companion Sasha narrated by Sasha.
This was SUCH a funny book! One of the best sci-fi books I’ve read for a long time. Narrated by Sasha, who is a robot that is programmed never to lie it is even more funny because her honesty gets Rex in some sticky situations.
Rex Nihilo is an immoral, gambling idiot who thinks he is the most amazing person ever. Every time he opened his mouth all I could hear in my head was Zapp Brannigan from Futurama. He always thinks he’s right and knows the best way to do things, while in the background he has his robot Sasha (his Kif Kroker) as his voice of reason, trying to guide him down a better path to not getting himself killed.
“I inquired about Rex’s plans once we got there. As usual, this was a mistake. Rex had no plans.
“You realize that you’re not going to be able to keep up this ruse.” I said, “A simple I.D check will reveal that you are not Gavin Larvaton. What do you think these rebels will do to you then?”
“You know what your problem is Sasha” Rex said, “you always want to have every little detail worked out in advance.”You’ve got to leave some room for improvisation.”
“My concern sir, is that you’ve given such a wide berth to improvisation that you’ve left no room for planning.”
“You wound me, Sasha.” Rex sniffed. “I’ll have you know that while you’ve been fiddling with dials and whatnot, I’ve worked out the broad outlines of a plan:
Step 1. Scam as much money out of Princess whats-her-name and this Frenti group as humanly possible.
Step 2. Wreak vengeance on Gavin Larvaton by spreading the rumour that he’s aiding the Rebellion.
Step 3. Take a much needed vacation. Possibly in the Regulian sector.
Steps 1 and 2 won’t necessarily occur in that order by the way. Come to think of it, I might bump up step 3 a couple of notches. Yes, a vacation might be just what we need.
Sasha, plot out a course to the Regulian sector!”
“You forget, sir, that we have no money and, in fact are in hock to the tune of 1.6 billion credits. Also, on board, we have a partisan of the Rebellion.”
“Blast it Sasha! Alright, we’ll do it your way. Let’s hope this princess is obscenely wealthy, and stupid, and gorgeous. In that order.”
The best are the S’Postles (or Space Apostles) which are apparently the Jehova’s Witnesses of space who will seek you out and convert you to the worship of the “Secrets of Space”
“You just won’t believe how hugely, vastly, mind-bogglingly big it is!”
This quote from Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy that they threw into the story made me laugh out loud, and the absurd places where the S’Postles show up was great!
I HIGHLY recommend this book to any lovers of “Spaceballs: The Movie”, “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”, “Futurama”, or to anyone who just wants a good laugh.
Starship Grifters is Best Served With
A Rex Nihilo
As told in the story Sasha had put things online to lead people astray when trying to track down Rex Nihilo. He’s a “master hydroponic gardener from Kraan”, “the inventor of the super-sonic can opener”, “OR A DRINK MADE FROM REGULIAN VODKA, PARSNIPS AND TOMATO JUICE”
Ok. So, I couldn’t get the Regulian vodka at such short notice. Lol! So, I had to settle for just plain Vodka.
Since Sasha isn’t big on the exact details of the drink I had to trial and error my own amounts!
I first juiced my own parsnips!
Just to give you an idea of how many parsnips to get, this is the juice from 4. It gave me 5 oz of juice, but you really only require 3 oz (5 was a little sweet and not a lot of flavour)
- 2 oz Vodka (Regulian if you have it!)
- 3 oz Parsnip Juice
- Top with Tomato Juice (I cheated a little here after some testing and used V8 to add a little extra nutrition and flavour, if you do go with Original and NOT low sodium. It needs the salt)
- Added Salt and Pepper (I used Celery Salt… because..LOVE!)
- Add Ice in Glass if you want some
- Add Vodka
- Then Parsnip Juice
- Top with Tomato Juice, Salt and Pepper
- STIR WELL BECAUSE AT FIRST YOU HAVE….
DEFINITELY LOOKS SPACEY TO ME!
It tastes better than it looks AND it’s good for you!! ….minus the vodka I suppose….